I’ve neglected Tumblr. And for that I’m sorry

It’s 3am and even after the long ass day I had, my mind is in overdrive.

A few weeks ago I found out a former co-worker was diagnosed with cancer. For two weeks I’ve done everything possible to keep up to date on the her. Her mother trained me and I had many heart to hearts with the woman about many things when I worked at Cracker Barrel. Today I found out that the surgery she was suppose to have isn’t happening, she’s going to be doing treatments five days a week, and there is only a 25% survival rate for her type of cancer.

As I’ve told this to some, they have to throw religion into the mix. “god works in mysterious ways.”

Wait a second.You’re saying.”you forgot to capitalize that ‘G’.”

No, I didn’t. I know this might shock some people but I’m an atheist. I know…I’m going to hear it. But truth is…reasons like this are part of the reason I’m becoming more anti-religion everyday. And folks I live in a religious area.

As I child I remember hearing these messages that we’re all loved by our “father”. As I got older I started asking myself questions about why our “father” let things happen. I have said that god and I always had a love/hate relationship at that point. I know this is going to piss some off but at that age…it was like being in a bad relationship. I thought I couldn’t get by without this being by my side even though all this bad stuff happened. This went on for a long time until one day I just saw through it all.

I think my life has served as the reason for my atheism and when my father passed the way he did, it served as the thing that really sparked me. So to hear about my co-worker has just done more to make me realize there is no god.

Indiana, I am sooo ready for you. <3

claudiascarlett:

Holy mother of FUCK as if I’m only just learning this?!?!!?!?!

(Source: sweet-is-evil, via 3-scars)

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Bittersweet

I have two guys interested in my dad’s truck.

It’s bittersweet because I have a lot of great memories in that S10: playing what I dubbed the music game with my dad, (Who sings this? My dad either got it right off the bat or was wrong.) spending moments with him in that truck bitching about co-workers or telling a funny story about work….but I also have that last ride with him.

And I just noticed that the day the guys are coming to look at it is the exact day, three months ago, that he died.

But selling it…it will pay off his funeral bill and leave me with money I can use. Some will fund the trip to Fairmount next month.

I don’t want to see it it go but I have to move on. He’d understand.